48 Hours in the life of the King of The Mountain

King of the Mountain: Red polka dots on white background to signify best climber on the Tour de France.  I own one as Evans had a sale and it suits me, this makes me the King of the Mountain (to use my full title or KOTM for Short).  Behind the scenes...


  

Saturday 2pm: KOTM has to pack up the bike.  I am now hiring a personal bike packer as this is not what I signed up for.  Must be able to pack bike and clean it too.






 

 Bike packed, just to prove I've still got it.  That's bike packing if you were wondering.

Sunday 5am:  Off to training camp.  Bike is about to travel more miles in an hour than I will over the course of 9 days.  Considered wearing bike jersey on plane but probably would have gotten annoyed with people wanting photos with me. 

 

Monday 8am:  About to begin training, looks a little different from the view at the gym, which is a mirror.  Not going to wear sunscreen as I'm immune to the sun and King of the Mountains don't wear sunscreen.  This much I know. 

Monday: 83 Miles done, all uphill (as you would expect from a mountain goat.  Had to push on this bit as I wanted to get a sense of how difficult it would be to walk the Ride Across Britain.  

 

Still pushing as I only like biking downhill.

King of the Mountain learning to urinate in full gear.

Had to stop at home to apply anti chaffing cream...not feeling like a King now.

Leaning on pathetic gradient, show me a real mountain and I'll show you...something.

Monday 7pm: Ice bath, because as the KOTM I'm hardcore and my personal trainer suggested it...14 degrees and I've run out of Ice cubes. 

In full King of The Mountain gear, probably for the best.

Stupid idea, I have pooped myself it's so cold.

Literally Ridonkelous.  Too cold.  Game over.  Screw the recovery as I'm the King of the Mountain.